My @$## Granny and a Sweet Lady

On Saturday morning we learned that my sweet, sweet grandmother's twin (and by twin I mean CLONE) had passed away at the age of 96. She died in her sleep and had laid out her clothes that she wished to be buried in the night before she went to bed. Just like my grandmother, Ninnie, she (Irene) was the sweetest, softest lady to ever walk the planet. We all 3 shared a birthday, and after the death of my Ninnie, it was so special (and sad) to still be able to speak to Irene who laughed and talked just like my Ninnie. It was also very much like talking to someone from beyond the grave. She was that similar to her twin in appearance and every other way you could imagine. To say they were clones is not an exaggeration. I was so incredibly sad after hearing about her death, but I had to stop and remind myself that 96 years of life with no health problems, a large loving family, and 94 years with a twin who loved you more than life was something to celebrate, not be filled with sadness about. So, I went outside and watched 2 butterflies chase each other through my garden and thought of those two giggling, old ladies that I loved so much that are once again together. Holding hands like always.

My Ninnie once filled out a book for me called A Mother's Love. It was a book my church had given out on Mother's Day for a mom to fill out for her children. At that time, my Papa had just died after 63 years of marriage to my Ninnie, and I thought it would give Ninnie something to do to take her mind off of things. The questions were things like, "Describe your mother in her favorite dress" and "Describe a time when you were very afraid." It took her two years to complete the book, but she gave it to me a couple of years before she passed away at the age of 94. I learned things about her (and my family) that I had never known. For example, that my daddy had once given his baby sister a bath in Drano and almost blinded her for life. Also, that my Ninnie's parents were share croppers and that she met my Papa at a barn dance in West Texas during those share cropping days. That she and my Papa were married on a Thursday morning. She in a blue dress that cost $8.00 and my Papa in borrowed clothes. Following their wedding, they spent their first married night back at her parent's "house". I don't think sharecroppers had a "house" like we would imagine these days. The day following their wedding at the preacher's house, my Papa left for 3 days to work on the WPA. Isn't it amazing the history a family can have?

In that same book, my Ninnie wrote page after page about Irene. About how Irene was her "joy" and that on the day my Ninnie and Papa were married, Irene "took to the bed for a week and cried." Ahhhh. They were inseperable for their entire lives. Even the miles weren't strong enough to separate them. When my Papa died, Irene's children drove her to be by my Ninnie's side. They were both pushing 90 years of age at that time. As Irene entered the house, we all just started bawling as she was wearing the exact same dress, sweater and shoes that my Ninnie was wearing. Totally unplanned.
So, Saturday was a sad day for me. I no longer share a birthday with my 2 favorite ladies in the entire universe, but they are together now...and that is how they would want it.

We barely were over the shock of Irene's unexpected death, when we received a call Sunday morning that my #$#%#$# Granny had taken a horrible fall and wasn't doing very well. I needed to see her before it was too late, so I drove (10 hours) to see her. I took Sophy with me, and Ben stayed home with the boys. In typical D.Granny fashion, she was ungrateful, pissy, and entirely too grumpy for words. THAT is what makes her my #%$^%#$^ Granny. She rolled her eyes at the doctor. She lied, repeatedly, to my mom, her sister and their youngest brother (this is the #T%$%$# Granny who birthed 12 children) about whether or not she had taken her medicine as prescribed, about the last time she had eaten, about how many cigarettes a day she was smoking. We learned yesterday that she has some very large internal bleeding and was given 3 units of blood today, an enlarged heart to go with her several other MAJOR health issues that will never be corrected (emphysema, diabetes, flebitis, etc.), and something unspeakable growing in her lungs. Anyone else would've been dead 15 years ago, but there is only one $%$^$ Granny, I promise ya that. Besides the whiskey probably has pickled and preserved for a while longer. You've never met anyone like her, and you're probably glad because of that. We're not sure how long she has. She's on borrowed time already, but she's just too stinking mean to die. She's as tough as they come. And ornery too. Bless her heart.
Could I have been spawned from 2 more polar opposite camps of women? I don't think so. Bless my heart!

Bears, Trains and a Monkey in a Space Suit

Space is no longer the final frontier. Look out Mr. Spock.

The kindergarten classes had their annual Bear Parade today! Look how sweet!

A recent pic of Jack and his Pop. It's hard to tell who loves trains more. It's equally hard , on most days, to tell who is the child and who is the alleged adult.

A loaded question from Cinderella and a 9 year old who doesn't like to travel alone.

That is, I think, most likely the longest title I've ever managed.
I really didn't intend to make another entry, but after a very disturbing encounter with Cinderella's Magic Mirror, I felt compelled to share. I had just opened Sophy's closet door, walked in and switched on the light when her Cinderella talking vanity said to me, "Don't you think I'm pretty?" Cinderella usually only speaks when you push her buttons, but I'm guessing she's having battery issues. So, I was a little perplexed as to why she was addressing me. Either way, I didn't answer her, which is why she continued with a much deeper toned, "Don't you think I'm pretty?"
I'll admit, the Satan tone got my attention, so I answered her. "Girl, have a little self respect. You should've spiked your step-mother's Pepsi with Drano a long, long time ago. And don't even get me started on Drucilla and Anastasia. A little rope and duct tape would do them some good...So, do I think you're pretty? I dunno. I think you're a very weak influence for little girls, and you really need to step up and work on your self esteem issues." GardenDaddy walked up about that time and cocked his eyebrow at me. I pointed to the vanity and shrugged. As he walked away, Cinderella said, "Don't you think I'm pretty?" I stuck my tongue out at her and closed the closet door. She's still in there. Waiting for me.

Jack has been swimming at the gym with GardenDaddy lately. Tonight I told Jack about the Olympics and how he could participate in the Games if he kept practicing hard. He got all teary and said, "Mom. Where do they have the Olympics?" I told him the really cool part! That the Olympics are held in countries like Australia, China, Japan. More tears. He goes, "I can't go to another country by myself!" Hahhaa. Duh! Doesn't he know I'm going to college with him? It only stands to reason that I'd go to the Olympics with him too. Ha!

With Monday On The Way....

This pic seemed pretty appropriate to the start of the school week! Well, at least from this side of the teacher's desk. I'm sure it feels the same for those wearing student shoes too.....and mommy shoes. Ok, ok. It's a Monday now matter how you slice it, right?
Have a good week everyone!

Saturday Sniffles

My first two weeks of school were productive, I guess. I have the beginnings of a head cold, so the weeks weren't a total loss! Hehe. Actually, I think it's Golden Rod allergies or something. Mostly I'm just sniffling and sneezing my head off. Whoohoo! As I type, I have a chef salad made and potatoes baking for lunch, Sam is sweeping the kitchen and has just emptied all of the trash cans in the house, Sophy has music blaring in her room and is "dancing like a star", and DaddyPinkie and Jack are at the gym swimming laps. After they get home, we're heading to a movie and dinner in town with the kids. I wish they would hurry up! I want lunch already.

Week 2 of school went great for the kids. Sophy is WAY too impressed with PE, and Sam has made 90's and 100's on his sight word and spelling tests. Jack has a new friend that has "really stinky breath that smells like rotten eggs", but that is okay because he can run really fast and "is a pretty nice guy." That's my boy. Do all 9 year olds look past the stinky breath of a potential friend? I don't think so. My Jack is a kind-hearted fellow, for sure. Sophy, on the other hand, has a gaggle of girlie girls in her class that are all very concerned with hair bows, necklaces, and pink sparkly lunch boxes....Sophy included. Her nightly clothes laying out sessions are very extensive and grueling. Why can't our district wear uniforms? UG!

Ooops. I smell potatoes burning....arrgghhhhhhhh.

ARRGGHHH!

We're here! I promise! Things are INSANE right now with ballet for Soph, gym class for all 3, soccer practice for Jack, homework for all 3, etc, but life is really good. The kids are happy, loving school (for the most part), and doing really well. Sophy LOVES kindergarten, and Sam is tolerating first grade. HA! Third grade is a definite shift in gears from second grade, but we are managing. Jack seems happy, and he loves being a third grader. My classes are going super, and T'giving break can't come soon enough. All at the same time. I LOVE my 7th graders, and I'm getting to know my 6th graders. DaddyPinkie and the boys are working on a model train set ($$$$pit) with PinkiePop in our "free" time...haha, and I am getting back into walking when possible, and this post is starting to sound like a beauty pageant narrative. Not that I've ever been in a pageant. Those of you who know me are surely giggling at the thought. Pfffft.
Speaking of beauty pageants, where is Elaina? Does she read this blog anymore? These are the things I wonder about in the middle of the deep, dark night.

Taco Bell...uhhhm. Guess what is for supper tonight? Hehe.

In other news, we're ANXIOUSLY awaiting Survivor (Amy!) and dreaming of going to England (Ang!). Survivor is a sure thing...England, well, we'll see! Also, there has been some pretty serious talk of selling our house and building. The thought of building a house totally makes my hair stand on end, but DaddyPinkie's business has grown so much that it is almost a necessity at this point. If we build, we're doing a pool...so guess where my vote is? HA! Uhm, yeah! It's always been something we've talked about while keeping at arms length, but it's getting unavoidable. DaddyPinkie's home business is becoming more business and less home which is good and crazy.
This weekend we're planning a trip to the zoo or park with the kids, so I'm hoping to have pics to share soon! Hope everyone out there is doing peachy!

We all survived!

I'll share the first day pics tomorrow, but I just wanted to let you all know that we lived through the first day. Ok. Ok. I lived through the first day! (Ang, Mrs. Ernestine came to me this a.m. to let me know that she was supposed to give me a hug/moral support, and I was about to weep as it was...and then I was like all crying on her shoulder...haha, I was a mess.) The kids all seemed to have had awesome days. Sophy was impressed with the rainbow parachute that kindergarten got to play with in PE! She wants one for Christmas. HAHA! I asked Sam to tell me about his day, and he told me, "Mom. Really. It was just so much that I can't even explain it all. My class is the busiest place I've ever been." He did tell me that his teacher "really knew what she was talking about." Pfft. Jack wasn't happy about the fact that "3rd graders are supposed to be quieter than most other kids." On his homework tonight he had to tell something about himself. He said, "After I play outside, you might think I smell like sweat...but don't worry, I don't stink." HAHAHAHHAA. I didn't make him change it. He also included that he had "smooth ears" and "stinky socks." OOHHH, the mind of a 3rd grader. I love it!
We survived! Thanks for remembering me Ang. I needed an Ernestine shoulder this a.m. How did you know? :-)

There is no easy way to say this.....

MY BABY IS GOING TO KINDERGARTEN TOMORROW!

MY OTHER BABY IS GOING TO FIRST GRADE TOMORROW!

MY OTHER-OTHER BABY IS GOING TO THIRD GRADE TOMORROW!

I hope I can live through it. Be still my heart, and sweet Lord please give me courage to send the baby of us all to kindergarten.
Did you hear me?
The BABY!!! ARRGGHH.

I am an OLD woman, I tell you.

Clothes are laid out, supplies are loaded in the car, lunch boxes are sitting ready on the counter to be filled, backpacks are hanging in the mudroom in their cubbies, finger nails and toe nails are painted (not the boys--haha), and 3 little children are as excited as can be about their first day of school (1 quite possibly a tad less excited than the other two...one hint, he has red hair....).

Tropical Storm

This is what a tropical storm (Erin) looks like when it breaks up over the Hill Country of Texas.

Weekend Pics

You may notice a theme from the waterpark, surrounding vehicles, and buildings. Who knew there was such a thing as The Blue Bell Aquatic Center? Yes, that is the Blue Bell factory in the background. THE Blue Bell factory. Yes, Sophy is riding a floating ice cream sandwich. Yes, Jack is attempting to walk on a popsicle. Yes, they serve real BLUE BELL ice cream there. If you know anything about Blue Bell, then you know where we were!

On the road again....

If no one vomits between now and Friday, we're going to go to Austin to visit my brother and his family. The kids have been begging to see their cousins, so my SIL (the one who NEVER updates her blog, ahem...) and I are going to take the kids to a water park. Yes, we seem to be drawn to them like a fly to honey, so what's your point? We're water park junkies, so there. I'm sure we'll find somewhere to shop with our 5 well-behaved children in tow. If you live in the Austin area, you may want to remain in your homes this weekend. If I can remember to take my camera, I'll snap some pics to share.

My brother and DaddyPinkie have something Top Secret manly planned so as to conveniently avoid being in attendance at the water park. I could tell you about it, but then I'd have to kill you...and well, that would be really rude of me to do to you....since mostly I only know of 2 of you who read this....and well, I like both of you. So, where was I? Oh yes, manly things. Due to the nature of my brother's work, I am afraid I can't elaborate on the manliness of their excursion. So why did I mention it? I dunno. Suspense? Allure? Intrigue? Nanny-nanny-boo-boo?

I spent much of the afternoon at Chuck E. Cheese with some of Sam's first grade friends. It was sort of an unexpected get-together, but the kids had a good time. I think we were supposed to meet DaddyPinkie's dad for lunch, but we never heard from him...so, off I went to Chuck E. Cheese. Seeing as how we would have had lunch at a decent restaurant with the Sr.DaddyPinkie, it didn't feel like a fair trade. Mostly because Chuck E. Cheese is a communist-based, money laundering, tyranically ruled, mob funded business front for a human trading and export monopoly. Don't worry. We had the last laugh at Chuck. The costume clad mouse appeared to wave to the kiddos, and Sophy attached herself to his leg and wouldn't let go for what seemed like 15 minutes. Chuck E. had to work for his outrageously priced fun today. Oh yes indeedy.
As a reward for her efforts to speak out against price gouging in the kiddie food industry, I took Sophy to get her hair trimmed at the "salon" today. She has been looking forward to this for a while, so we went and took that off the list. Of course, we had to FLY to make it to gymnastics in time, but we looked good when we got there. That's all that matters in the end.

Hhhhmmm. What else? Well, tomorrow night is Back To School Night for my campus. I'll be wearing black, just so ya know. I'm actually looking forward to seeing my group from last year. Bunch of little weirdos. I just loved 'em all to pieces.

((SHAMELESS PRODUCT ENDORSEMENT))

If you haven't tried the Cinnamon/Brown Sugar Go-Tarts from PopTarts, uhhhm....do it as fast as humanly possible. They are NOTHING like a PopTart. They're soft and bready and taste like a stinking cinnamon roll. I just happen to know that they are also wondermously delicious with a cup of hot tea (Black Negrili with a splash of milk.) Beware. They actually have the power to communicate with you via mind control from your cupboard. Just so ya know. Of course, that only applies to the very weak minded people wh........((no I did NOT go get one...shut up.))

What a girl wants.

All manner of name calling.

My children are ready to go to school. Wait. Correction. I'm ready for school to start. I have never in my life heard such chiding, teasing, whining, and name calling....not to mention how the kids are behaving. HarHar. We're down to a few last funnsies before The Big Day. We have a playdate with some classmates planned, a few swim dates, a trip to the "salon" for Sophy, a trip to the movies, and HOPEFULLY, a tiny road trip for one last spin.

How 'bout a few photos?

Here you see The Red Monster getting ready to torment his siblings in the pool at his GrandPinkie's house. The kid lives to make others miserable. Seriously, he had a plan hatching in his head as I snapped the pic.

In the meantime, Jack and Soph were in the middle of a very heated "Dive Off." Here you see Sophy delivering a "Super Tuck."
Jack answers with a very difficult "Flying Dutchman."

Hope everyone is staying cool! 'Cause dang it, it's hot!

The Wonder Years

Wayne & Kevin Arnold. Winnie Cooper. Pure gold.
That's all I've got to say about that.

Those of you familiar with the insanity world of teaching know just how much fun a workshop is to attend. Guess where I spent my day? Uh-huh. I just so happen to have spent my day at one of those dreadful, mind numbing, I-want-to-stab-myself-in-the-eyeball-with-a-pencil workshops. I know what you're thinking. Aren't they all stab-your-eyeball worthy? Yay, I say to thee. Yay.

There was a bright spot in the otherwise dreary day today. The Lord in Heaven had Mercy on my pathetic soul and saw fit to end the Misery that was being inflicted upon myself.....we got out early. Early meaning that I was home from the ever-painful workshop by 2 o'clock. I must be living right...or something. We went straight to the pool after I made it home and had a lovely time until way past the supper hour. Once we made it home, I somehow morphed into a short-order cook that would've made the gals slinging hash at IHOP envious. What is it about swimming that makes a child so ravenous? Somewhere along the way, Mr. Pinkie made it home from a photo shoot with a Philly Cheesesteak from Chili's in tow. God Bless that guy. I do love him so.

A car trip....and no one tossed their cookies...

We're home again. Did you know we left? Probably not. We traveled to South-ish Louisiana to visit Daddy Pinkie's sister and her family. The kids had a wonderful time and the grown-ups were well fed! Dr. Brother-In-Law, aka Dr. BIL, cooked awesome steaks one night and fried fish the next. Yes, we can die happy now. Daddy Pinkie was on unfamiliar territory with 2 square meals served 2 nights in a row. RARE events indeed for us. Of course, I left the camera at home, so I have no pics of the waterpark we went to or of the kids running wild. Sadness!
And so we have returned home and the Pinkie-in-Law's home is probably very still and quiet.

We're off to the dentist now for cleanings for Jack and Sophy. Sam gets a cleaning next week, if I can remember the appointment! Pffft.

Aren't they lovely,...er....frightening ..too?

Isn't she lovely?

Ray Bethell (Multiple Kite Champion)

Jack's Doc Visit

We addressed Jack's frequent migraines at a doc visit today. Our doc wasn't thrilled at the frequency of his headaches and the fact that they often cause him to vomit. We have an appointment Monday morning to see if a "brain scan" is warranted, and I'll update when I know more about that. Say a prayer for my boy if you can.
After his doc appointment, I took him shopping all by himself. He got to pick out his school clothes without his pesky little brother and bossy little sister at his heels. He had so much fun. After the shopping was over, I took him to his favorite greasy diner for supper. Waffles, bacon and three giant glasses of milk. The kid is a bottomless pit. We were discussing how much fun our "date" was when Jack told me that one day he would "find him a lady and give her a date."
Oh my.
Say a prayer for my little casanova.

A List for Angela

5 Things I Liked About Today:

1. I got to meet Ang and Mrs. Ernestine for lunch at this lovely place. In the world of me, lunch with an adult is a rare and beautiful thing to be treasured, which it was and I did. I only hope I didn't bore them to tears. Did I? Don't answer that.

2. As far as I know, my underwear exhibition went unwitnessed. No neighbors have complained yet. It is my fervent prayer that Sam forget this incident as soon as possible, or at least before he goes back to school. The kid has a really, really big mouth, and he loves nothing more than telling a great story. Ug.

3. I went to JulieAnne's bakery and bought a half dozen sand tarts to ease my underwear induced humiliation. I'm sure there will be nightmares tonight.

4. There are 23 days until school starts. I think.

5. I liked the fact that only 1 of my 5 assorted tea sandwiches was laced with cucumber.

There you have it!

Caught with my pants down. Yes. Really.

Do you ever realize that your lip gloss is in the your daughter's room when you need it to finish your morning toilette, or perhaps your mascara is in the treehouse? It could be that your concealer is in your purse which is in the car, just like mine was this morning. I had a hot date for lunch, so I was trying to look my best presentable. I realized that my concealer was in my purse in the car. Apparently, the last time I had used it was for a drive-by cover up. (Ba-Dom-Bom-Ching!)

So, I'm scantily clad. We'll just leave it at that. If you are more curious than that, just picture a HANES HER WAY commercial or some such undergarment advertisement. That would be me. Like I said, I was getting ready to hit the road, and my state of undress was not priority. I was in a rush, or maybe I just wanted to match my children who are perpetually in their underpants and less.
To get to the meat of the story, I was rummaging through my purse which happened to be in the cargo area of the car. With the back hatch door lifted, my head stooped inside the cargo area, and my butt in the air, Sam opened the garage door for me. I have to say "for" me because he SWORE that he was just trying to give me a little more light to dig by. Ya know, it actually didn't dawn on me immediately that I needed to duck and cover. No, I'd say my reaction time was rather disappointing for a mother of three. I should've known to be ready to run. Instead, I was more worried about the garage door ripping off the lift gate of the car. At some point, I must've felt a draft because I jumped into the back of the car and pulled the hatch down behind me. Somewhere, someone designed a hatch that is as difficult as sin to close behind yourself as you jump in nakey. Anyway. After lots of screaming and wailing on my part, Sam was finally convinced to put the door back down so Mommy could crawl out of the car. In her underwear. I'm telling ya, the humilation was right up there with my naked frog dance. At least that one wasn't on public view.
I did find my concealer. Just so ya know.

The Garden

Sophy has apparently been doing some gardening. She might as well, I've certainly let my duties go. She is out there most every evening digging around and clipping things.
The garden is sooo overgrown. I should be ashamed. But it's this rain. Honest. We've had so much!

Aretha is getting huge! (Aretha is growing on the arch.)

The miles do add up.

I just logged on to map quest for a mileage quote.
For our trip on Friday to my d#$m Granny's 80th birthday bash to where all of our Texas family lives, we will have to drive 6 hours and 8 minutes. If you are not from Texas, that means that I will be driving from the state line (which is about 10 miles from my house) of East Texas to some point far West, and I'll still be a bazillion and 3 miles from any portion of the West state line of this fair state.

It's like when your friend buys a house with a 10 acre yard, and they're so happy with themselves. Secretly, you're thinking, "HAHA!! You have to mow it! Not me!! WHHEEEE!!!"
I'm thinking when Texas signed the title/deed to the state; all the little states around us were like, "SUCKERRRRRR!!!" Well, lucky for us the western portion doesn't need so much mowing as dusting. In large part, I guess we have to thank Mr. Santa Anna for our independence. Were it not for his Napoleonic views of himself, he might actually have been allowed to be president of Mexico for more than a day or two. Still, I'm not sure who we have to thank for our Biggie Sized Borders? Mr. Austin? Mr. Houston? Kinky Friedman? Moses Rose? Blue Bell Ice Cream? No wait. That is what is responsible for my "big borders." Snicker, snicker.

Bottom line. I could arrive in Memphis, Tennessee faster than I could get to the tiny town where my grandmother lives. If I drove West for another 12 hours from her house, I MIGHT reach the state line of New Mexico. Thank ya, though. I'll not be going that far.

So, we've got lots of road running, doctor appointments, and errands to see to. I do know I'll be seeing my mom's surviving siblings during our visit. There are about 7; I'm thinking, and my 42 first cousins. That is not a made up number.
Lucky for us Texas is a large state, huh? Else I might have married kinfolk.

I'm looking for family/ancestral (hello...is THAT a real word?) information on this trip. I'll be sure and present a book report on my family tree to the class when I return.

Krunchy Club

We joined our local country club for the pool. Most people (heck, EVERYONE) that knows me probably laughs uncontrollably at the thought of me anywhere near a "club" or the "country" for that matter. The place does have a super nice pool and a nice dinner on Sunday afternoons, so those were big selling points. Ok, they were the only real selling points for me. Plus, it's about 4 minutes from our house. My daughter must not be the "country club" type either. As we pulled out today from a swim, she said, "Mom. I guess this is a pretty neat krunchy club."
Yep. She's a chip off the old, krunchy block.

Oh. And PS. Much to my happy surprise, I was able to see Ang who is in from London. She promises to update (ahem..hint,hint) her blog forthwith (is that a real word?) and with bucolic pics and everything! She happened by the school with her mom and witnessed the color frenzy that is my classroom! YAY!
Happy USA, Ang.

Jack's dental appt. went well.
I remembered!
Hoohoo.

Pizza's here.
Drooool.

Ahhhh, now this is the life!

Jack just made breakfast for Sam and Sophy. Deep breath. In. Out. Remain calm!! ((Sniff, sniff)) I've waited for this day for sooooo long! This opens up a whole world of possibilities! ((Evil laugh inserted here.))

Pioneer Woman is my hero.

As a rule, I try to stay as far away from my kitchen as possible. Not long ago, I started reading through Pioneer Woman's blog and became inspired (yes, it's true) by her recipes, food photos, and such. Do you ever get the impression that things like cooking and sewing and ironing are like things that the instructions came to you printed in a foriegn language? No? Well, maybe it's just me then. That is, until I found P. Woman. Check out her site if you think I lie, but I promise you...I do not fabricate. Tonight for supper we had her tenderloin, corn pudding, and twice baked potato recipes. TO DIE FOR, and yet I still live...to cook another day.
Wanna know something even more awe inspiring? I decided to make the twice baked spuds into a casserole. She called for milk in her recipe, yet on a whim, I used heavy cream (sllluurrpp...) and smushed it all together much like you would do for the restuffing into tater skins, except at that point, I smushed in the potato skins and threw it all into a baking dish and topped it with cheese and TA-DA! It was so amazing! I CAN COOK! WHO KNEW?? Not GardenDaddy, I assure of that. He definitely didn't know!
Head on over and check her out! She's awesome, and her husband is a hunk. And so is his brother. And some guy named Matteo. HOT TAMALES! Speaking of, I wonder if she makes those.

Nanny McPhee

Does anyone else out there love her as much as I? No. There is no possible way. The movie is genius. Magical. I love it almost as much as I love sand tarts from JulieAnne's bakery. So there.

Pics Again

This was the morning we were leaving. Don't they look sad?


This is such a subdued photo of Sam. I love it...except for the GIANT SHADOW in the pic. Pffffft.


Weep for the enemy.

Beach Pics

We rented a pontoon in Destin and cruised the sand bars. There was the cutest little ice cream boat selling frozen snacks and playing ice cream music. TOO CUTE! Who knew such a thing existed? We found several areas where we were able to wade in knee to waist deep water and let the kids fish around for hermit crabs. The water was so clear and calm...not the first wave! It was really nice. If you're ever in Destin, rent a pontoon (and pack a picnic.) The lovely photo above was one sand bar stop we made. The pic below is of First Mate Jack.


The babies that I birthed have become so foriegn to me. I don't know who the children below are. Where are my babies? Well, they're cute kids....no matter who they belong to.




Sophy + Water = Happy Girl

Ok. So this isn't the beach, but it was Jack's first helicopter ride. Notice how he is sprinting towards the aircraft? He was realllly excited. This is in Mobile at the USS Alabama.

An Ode To Mike Rowe

Your eyes are alive
They are very squinty
I'm sure if I were close to you
Your breath would smell so minty
Sometimes you are sarcastic
Always you are funny
You've inseminated cows
I don't think you've inseminated a bunny
I laugh right along when you do what you do
But I cringe when you cringe while you're shoveling poo
Don't worry Mike
Don't you fret
I'll always watch
When you're grooming a pet
You're my hero
You're a thrill
The only problem
You're NOT Gryll(es)

Bend it like Posh Spice.

I'll admit it. I'm a tabloid-celeb stalking junkie. Who knows why? Certainly not me. The Beckham clan fascinates me. I think Vic is about as smart as a TicTac, but I did watch her Welcome to America special the other night. I laughed really hard at a lot of things that I do not think were intended as comedy. Maybe that is why I like celeb news. It makes me feel, I dunno, intelligent in comparison. And the Cruises. Man, they are CREEPY! Their ever-growing list of cronies is even creepier. Which is why I suppose my Hollywood fascination will have to remain second fiddle to my obsession fascination with Mike and Bear.

Coming soon, An Ode To Little Mikey Rowe

The Chronicles of Aqua Lung

Edited to say: E.Jo! I will post pics! Good idea. And yes, m'am! I had some serious fume buzzing going on. There was some question as to whether or not I should be allowed to drive home, but in the end, my co-workers who were there yesterday patted me on the back and said, "Well, be careful." We care for each other a lot, as you can see! Oh, and when I pulled into the garage, I crashed into some things. "Some things" being bicycles and the occassional scooter. You know, small things. HA! :-)
In case you were wondering, I did end up in a cloud of paint fumes yesterday afternoon. The results were mixed. My bookshelves are now beautiful shades of pink, purple, lime, and garnet. My short filing cabinet is aqua, and the door to my classroom closet is turquoise. My tall filing cabinet is banana yellow. I'm on the hunt for sheer curtains with banana, lime, garnet, purple, and watermelon polka dots. It's coming together nicely, but there is something on my mind that I have to share with you. I can't sit back and leave these words unspoken. You would think that there would be strict warnings on the spray paint cans instructing you to NEVER spray paint indoors. How could the makers of spray paint be so derelict in their duties? What's that? There are instructions stating to NEVER spray paint indoors? Hhhmmm. Must've missed those. Or thought they didn't apply to me. Or something. Ahem. Needless to say, I have a nice case of black aqua lung now. So, uh...yeah. Spray painting indoors. Bad. Scratch that one off the list. ((Random side note: the giant window was open. It just wasn't enough. Again, bad idea.)) How do I know it was a bad idea? Well, my aqua lime colored lungs are hurting, and I had the shakes until about 10:30 last night. I'm just saying. Paint outside people. 'Cause...Duh!!! ((Random side note #2: I am aware there are blatant health warnings on spray paint cans regarding painting indoors. In case you couldn't detect the sarcasm dripping from my words here. Ha! I'm just not berry good at thinking rules apply to me. Because my body is obviously impervious to biohazards and chemicals. PFffffft.))

Mommy of GardenPinkie and Pop of GardenPinkie will be going out of town tomorrow for 12 days, and they asked if the kids could stay the night with them tonight. HECK YEAH! Wahhoooo. I'm loving the random grandparent sleepover invites we get these days! DaddyPinkie and I are going to see a movie and grab some dinner. GET OUT OF TOWN! Unexpected grown-up time! SCORE!

The Trash Can of Inspiration

A big thing is happening in the little town where I teach. We're getting a new high school. It may not sound like much to you, but you'll just have to believe me when I tell you there hasn't been a new building resurrected in this town since about 1964. Possibly later. With the building of the new school, my campus is moving to the NOT-AS-OLD campus that the previous high schoolers vacated, since the middle school campus we had been using was built before or during Segregation for the black students of the community. Yesterday was day one of room work. I mostly emptied boxes, filled book shelves, etc. Not to tell you every mundane decision I made, but I did ditch desks in favor of lots of tables and chairs from our old science lab. These tables are solid wood and will be around long after I'm gone from this institution of insanity knowledge. The tables were painted black at some point, I assume, to match the black Formica tops. Since this is the same school district I attended 5th-12th grades, I assume these are also the tables where I sat in middle school as I destroyed dissected frogs, sheep hearts and cow eyes. Ahhh, the fun memories. I love dissection, but I digress. Back to the trash can of inspiration. So, last night I returned to Lowes (where you may recall I just gifted them with $1,500) and purchased the cutest trash can with bright summer colors and flip flops. This then led to me cruising to the spray paint aisle where I picked up aqua, fuchsia, orange, and lime paint. We're not allowed to paint the white walls, but stand back everyone...Room #3 is about to become INSPIRED!

In other exciting news, we're going swimming today with our church's children's groups. Every Tuesday, the children's departments meet for a Fun Day, and today is a swimming party. Even though it's a disruption to my paint fume sniffing aspirations, I guess we'll go. I plan on being in a cloud of paint by late afternoon, though. Just so ya know.

Let's see. What else? Dirty Jobs is a new epi tonight. Deep breath in....deep breath out....deep breath in....deep breath out. My sweet, little Mikey Rowe. Ahhhh.

More? Alrighty. Hhhmmm. We'll be making three road trips in the next 6 weeks or so. The last weekend in July we are heading to my grandmother's 80th surprise birthday bash in West Texas. She isn't doing very well, and this may be the last time we all have to see her. We call her my d@*# Granny because that is what she calls herself. Cusses a blue streak, she does. For example, after walking into her house, she would likely tell you (in her gruff smoker's voice) "Come over here and kiss your d@*# Granny." She's quite....colorful. I guess after birthing 13 babies, you just sort of get rough around the edges. Where was I? Road trips. The first weekend in August, we'll be heading to South Louisiana to visit with DaddyPinkie's sister and her family. Last but not least, we plan on traveling to Hot Springs, Arkansas the third week of August to visit with GardenPinkie's dad/step-mom. I know what you're thinking. Take a bucket! You're catching on to how we roll!

The Baby IS Alive

Ok, so if Life would slow down at all, I might be able to update about our trip! We came home to a totally dead fridge! YAY! I guess this was fates way of paying us back for someone not puking during our vacation, although Jack had a migraine last night and emptied it like 3 times before finally falling asleep. Luckily, all 3 up-chuck events made it into some variety of waiting receptacle. In the meantime, I had about 15 different ice chests scattered throughout the kitchen/breakfast nook/dining room, so everytime someone needed a drink of milk, or an apple, or a Capri Sun......well, I had to put on my hip waders and dive in. By the end of the day, I felt like I was playing Memory with coolers instead of cards. So, guess what we did today after church? A trip to Lowes. To buy a fridge. A stupid fridge. Because we're disgustingly wealthy and have $1,500 to drop whenever we feel like it. Right after a vacation. And right before school clothes and supplies are around the corner. Yep! We're crazy like that.
Honestly, I couldn't tell you which brand we bought, but I do like it way more than the old box. It's very smart and well, it's cold. Which is a just an added bonus when you're me.

My GrandPinkiePop wants to take the kids tomorrow to the airport where he works to ride in a helicopter, but I have to go to Shawshank school tomorrow to see my new classroom and attempt to set some things up. I'm looking forward to getting back in the groove, and I can't WAIT to see some of my old students. It's crazy how much you miss the little armpits angels . Perhaps I'll wrap up at in my room early enough to make it to our appointed helicoptering. I'll be sure and take pics!

Speaking of babies who are alive (haha, you wondered what the title was about...right?), remember Baby Alive? Well, in 2006 she made a come back, complete with lots of cooing, burping, self-blinking eyes, wrinkling nose with sniffing sounds when she says "Uh-Oh, I made a POOP", and the excretory extravaganzas that you remember from childhood that looked like Baby had been eating something radioactive/nuclear.
Santa brought Sophy a Baby Alive this past Christmas, and I want to tell you right now. All joking aside. This doll is THE creepiest thing to ever wear a preemie diaper and suck a paci. Seriously. She SUCKS a paci. The manual encourages the "mommy/owner" to "give the doll her paci" in the event that she "won't stop crying." Yes. It happens. PinkieDaddy slammed a door earlier. Guess who woke up from her lloonngg beauty rest? Baby Alive. She cried for over 10 minutes. Sophy came and got me and said, "Mom. Is there something you can do to make her hush?" I had to rummage around in her crib for her PACI to stick in her MOUTH so she would SHUT UP! What then? She deep breathes like a phone sex operator. Know why? Because she CRIED FOR 10 MINUTES! It's insane. Insane! And I bought her. With money! I should've been saving for the fridge.

So many pictures..so little time.

While trying to sort, unpack, feed, bathe, survive, etc., I thought I'd attempt to choose one cute pic from the trip. It's so hard!

Throw Mama From the Car

It may be a few days before the world stops flashing by my eyes like so many fence posts, passing 18 wheelers, cows, hitchers, McDonald's and truck stops, but I promise to update with TONS of pics from the trip as soon as my land legs are back! Daddy Pinkie lets me drive when we make long car trips, so I've had the distinct priveledge of driving TO and FROM Ft. Walton Beach, Florida. Uhm. Yeah, I wanted to throw mama from the car more than once!
For now, I'll leave you with an entry from Jack's journal:
July 12, 2007
My family is in Jackson Mississippi. Our hotel has bunkbeds. Sophy has to sleep on the couch. I want pancakes for supper at Shoneys and Dad says no. I think IHOP is around the corner. Mama told me to write down things I want to remember.

1. Sam getting stung by a jellyfish and crying.
2. Riding on the boat to crab island.
3. Big Kahunas
4. Riding in a helicopter at Mobile Alabama
5. Touching owl poop pellets at the museum of natural science in Jackson Mississippi.
6. Going to the train exhibit.
7. Going on the giant USS Alabama in Mobile.
8. Riding the waves at the beach on my new surfboard.
9. The swimming pools at our beach house.
10. Seeing the dolphins near crab island.

Interesting Side Note: It did not rain on us once while in Florida. It rained on us 8 times from Alabama to Louisiana, and it began raining at home about 15 minutes after we pulled into the garage.

((Why can't I type in the title line? STRANGE DAYS! ))

Hello from sunny Florida! We're having a grand time, and the kids will be on a sun/sand high for weeks to come. We're mostly sunburned and lovin' life. My FIL, aka Mr. Wonderful, brought his laptop with him, so I'm lovin' life at the moment also! We were so afraid that the rain we've had at home would follow us here, but it hasn't rained one drop! Having said that, I'm sure it will flood tommorow. Like biblical flooding.

Sam just returned from surfing with Daddy Pinkie and Jackson and informed me that he was stung by a jellyfish. He is rather proud of himself. Sophy is now crying because she wasn't stung by a jellyfish. We're a crazy bunch. We love pain. Apparently.

We spent the morning here and had a wonderful time. It's our third year in Florida to spend with the Big Kahuna, and the kids wait all year to return there. When we entered the water park this morning, the kids were chanting and rocking the car. It's was pretty scary for the parents. We went down every slide known to man, sloshed in wave pools, blasted through tunnels, swam through waterfalls, etc. We actually avoided the major crowds we've encountered in the past. It was super nice for the majority of the day. By the time we left, it was crowding up, but who cares? We were leaving. Pah.

As I type, Sophy is attempting to draw a Leatherback Sea Turtle in her memory book. Not that we've seen one, of course. She's wishing. In other news, Sophy is working on the tan of my dreams. How unfair is it that my 5 year old looks Brazilian while her mommy looks Norwegian. Or Irish. Or...well...white? I ask you, how fair is it? NOT FAIR. That's what.

Jack is really enjoying this vacation. He has really turned into quite the surf junkie. He's on the waves every waking minute we're here. I'm so glad he's old enough to enjoy this trip in a way he never has before....right down to the annoying surf slang he's throwing around like a really Anglo person. It's comical, trust me.

Sam and his red headed self has actually avoided The Royal Sunburn, and for that I am thankful. Lets just hope we can hold out.

I may not be able to update before we head home, but rest assured, we are having a ball. Tomorrow we're renting a pontoon and heading out to a sandbar/lagoon area in Destin to float for the day. Sam's sunburn luck may run out with that jaunt on the books. We're planning on floating from 9 until 1, eating on the boat, etc. Should be fun. We also have reservations for dinner tommorow night at the place we go every year for our "fancy dinner." I can't wait. They have seriously wonderful Italian food.

On the way home, we're stopping in Jackson, Mississippi for the night. We're going to the Museum of Natural Science in Jackson before we leave town. All three kids are about to explode with excitement over this impending visit, thanks to Night At the Museum. They are convinced that they will see a T-Rex that comes to life. I'm hoping not.

Better scoot. Dinner plans aren't nailed down, and I'm starving!

Happy Sunshine!

Texas, Our Texas

Texas is drowning. It has been raining for 4 weeks, and last night it rained from 10pm until 5 o'clock this morning. Rural roads and highways in our county are closing. The people in the Hill Country areas, where we vacationed a few weeks ago, have it worse than we do here in East Texas. I love it, but I think it's starting to frighten the children. Our nightly prayers have started ending with, "and please let it stop raining."

On the TO DO LIST today:
Grocery shopping for the trip
Take kids to see a movie (you know..since IT'S RAINING)
Get pedicure
Load the car
Get swim meet gear together
...gee, it seems like I'm forgetting something.......

Brita!

Where are you in Florida? We will be in Ft. Walton! Hopefully it won't rain there next week. EEK! We've been to Florida for several years in a row now, and it has never rained. I'd say we're past due for a RAINY time!

Beach Packing Remembered

As the Pinkies switch into PACK LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT mode, I'd like to leave you with beach packing memories from last year. We'll be blazing a trail to Florida immediately after the swim championships on Saturday, but not before my yearly GYNO appointment tomorrow (now there is an entry you're dying to hear about, I'm sure), and a pedicure on Friday that I have been dreaming about for weeks. As Mr. Pinkie so sweetly put it, "You have nursing home feet." Eeewwweee.

Way down South where the black water flows...

I mean, Happy Fourth of July!

With a momentary reprieve from the rainy monsoon season that has settled upon us, we hurriedly festooned our Mule (no, not the HEEHAW kind) for our neighborhood's annual parade/picnic. Once the Freedom Wagon was ready to ride, we dashed off to the parade route. The kids enjoyed waving at the old folks and babies scattered along the route (I've read this post several times and with each reading I giggle as I imagine old people and babies SCATTERED along the roadside...which is sick...yet funny...er, well...nevermind), and one of our offspring was WAY too fond of ringing the blasted cow bell that was smuggled aboard. I still hear that stinking bell in my head....

Sadly, it did rain on our parade. Actually, it misted on our parade. We arrived back to the Picnic HQ house, set up the tables, munchies, hot dogs, etc. just in time for the skies to open up, and HELLO...we're back in Seattle again. THE RAIN IN SPAIN STAYS MAINLY IN THE PLAIN, but the rain in East Texas is DRIVING ME INSANE! Hahhaa. Actually, I love, love, love the rain. It could rain every day for all I care. Lucky for me, I may be getting my wish for the indefinite future. So, where was I? Oh yes. It rained. Luckily, Picnic HQ belongs to a super-nice family with an ENORMOUS house, drive, carport area. Several families (we weren't one of them) were graciously prepared with pop up tents, canopies, etc. Totally saved the day.

At some point, the monsoon turned into...well, hhhmm. What does a monsoon turn into when it gets angry? I dunno. All I know is that it was emptying buckets of rain. Thankfully there was no lightening or thunder, so the kids had a FIELD DAY playing in the rain. Somewhere after about an hour of hanging out, my fun-o-meter was at TILT, and I begged Mr. Pinkie to take us home. In the mule. The one with NO roof. In the downpour. It showed no signs of letting up you see. So, we bit the bullet and raced home in the pouring rain while our teeth chattered and the kids squealed. I won't tell you how many buckets of rainwater I was able to squeeze out of my underwear.

For now, we'll just think of the fun we had.

I lied.

I lied about The Drought.
I just recalled a conversation between myself and my only daughter that I should like to record for posterity.

Me: Sophy did you cut your hair in Sunday School this morning?

Sophy: Uhm. Nope.

Me: Are you sure? What's this weird spot here? Looks like you made a tiny snip?

Sophy: Uhm, hmmmm. Nope.

Me: You'll be in bigger trouble for lying than cutting your hair.

Sophy: I'm sorry, Mom. Yes. I didn't mean to.

Me: Ok, Sophy. I'm glad you told me the truth. Don't cut your hair, ok?

Sophy: (After a long, strained silence) Uh, Mama?

Me: Yes?

Sophy: I'm really sorry about cutting that OTHER little girl's hair.

Me: ((Mouth hanging open...unable to speak.))

Sophy: It's ok. It's ok.

Me: Sophy, please tell me that you didn't cut someone else's hair!

Sophy: I don't want to lie!

Me: Who was it?

Sophy: I don't know who she is.

Me: What color is her hair?

Sophy: White.

Me: Sophy, this is bad. How much did you cut?

Sophy: Don't worry, Mom. She'll never miss it.

A drought.

Despite the fact that it has been raining every day since May 15th or June 7th--take your pick, I am feeling as if I am experiencing a blog drought. I'll post (I just spelled it POAST..oh. my. gosh.) after we return from Florida on July 15th.
Happy Monsoon Everyone!

The grass is always greener...

on the other side of the house. Well, at least it will be if it continues raining in the front yard but not in the back as it is doing right now. Does that mean the devil is beating his wife? That it will rain at the same time tomorrow? That I will have to water the flower beds in the backyard? Yes, I'm betting on the latter.

We're readying our fleet of bicylces, scooters, and yard mules for our subdivisions annual 4th of July parade/picnic. The kids have balloons, streamers, Uncle Sam hats, beads, giant sunglasses, etc. You may remember that we missed last year's festivities due to a prolific amount of vomit spewing from all three of my children simultaneously. We're hoping to avoid that this year. I guess, I mean it really won't seem like a holiday unless someone vomits or poops, but we'll try to muddle our way through.

This morning we went to the pediatrician for well-kid visits. Sam and Sophy were delinquent on a shot that was a two-part shot, so they both got round #2 of HepA, I believe. Sam screamed and moaned while his sister was taking her shot (without a tear shed and with a smile on her face), and he screamed and moaned even louder when it was his turn. In true mommy fashion, I made it all better by promising him I'd take him to Barnes and Noble for a coffee. It worked. Sophy chose book #1 of the Junie B. Jones series, Jack got book #18 of The Magic Tree House series, and Sam nursed his coffee and played with the Thomas set-up. Hehe. I love that boy more than words can say. He has started throwing around words like "injustice" and "unfair" while maintaining his innocence in sibling altercations. At least he has stopped asking for a lawyer when he is in trouble.

If only 2 thirds of my children didn't wake up EVERY morning before 6:30 a.m., I might sleep in tomorrow (being Saturday and all.)Then again, if IF's and BUT'S were candy and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas. Right?

Happy Birthday To You

9 years ago I had been in labor for 10 hours praying for death to find me...not knowing I had almost 3 hours before Jackson would make his emergency c-sectioned entrance. Happy Birthday Baby Boy!

Sophy Claire's Favorite Things

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches
Sparkly Pink
Green Beans
Ribbons
Cats
Cartwheels
Swimming underwater
Mermaids and Fairies
Pink Seahorses
Rubies
M&M's
Red Roses
Pink Daisies
Pink Tulips
Stories about mice
The beach
Planting seeds
Rainbows with pink clouds
Bubble baths
Roller skating
Being a firefighter

Sam the Man's Favorite Things

Trash cans
Trash trucks
Trash
Trash men
Trash dumpsters
Ropes
Shovels
Axes
Hammers and nails
Plungers
Dirt
Rocks
Flashlights
Backpacks
Pliars
Sharp things
Staplers
Staple Pullers
Glue and Scotch Tape
Duct Tape
Vacuum Cleaners
Mops
Coffee

Jack Ryan's Favorite Things

Reading about trains
Riding on trains
Drawing trains
Drawing rockets
Going fishing
Cheese pizza
Riding my Razor scooter
Outer Space
Sharks
My marble collection
Dreaming about flying on the Saturn V
Superman
Doughnuts
Tornadoes
Underwater submarines
Swim Team and Swim Meets
Maple Syrup
Pankcakes
Honey on biscuits with lots of butter
Lightening McQueen
Riding on a REAL motorcycle
Baby ducks and baby rabbits
The color blue
Being a secret agent spy on a secret agent mission
Shark Week on the Discovery Channel (July 29th)
Being at the beach for 100 days...or maybe 1,000 days..or one trazillion days
Going to school...just kidding
Turning 9 TOMORROW!!

As the World Turns

While Earth is spinning, the following events have occured in the Pinkie home:

* We found out Sam has pneumonia. He's highly medicated and on the mend.
* Jack placed 1st, 4th, and 5th in his last swim meet in various events. Go him!
* I have had a migraine that will NOT leave me alone.
* It has rained every day for 3 weeks. And by rain, I mean monsoon season.
* I finally made it to the "beauty" shop to get my hair some attention. I look better, but I think "beauty" may be a stretch.
* Mr. Pinkie has started seriously working out again on his bike. He's looking mighty fine, and he's melting before my eyes. Not that he needed to melt, but he is feeling so much better. Maybe I should take my cues from him....or maybe not.
* My house began verbalizing it's need to be cleaned. I told it to shut up.
* We learned the names of the teachers for the Pinkie3 for the upcoming school year. YAY, on all 3 counts! We were pleased with all 3! WAHOO!!

Someone is digging in the freezer. Better go investigate.

Under the Texas Sun

Today we drove 6 hours, sat in the hospital for 3 hours with Sam after we arrived home (don't worry, everything is fine), and sat at swim team practice for 2 hours, but HEY! We're home! I missed the kids so much. Ugh. Our trip was a bittersweet mixture (mostly sweet) of alone time with Mr. Pinkie, fun activities, and a knot in my stomach because I couldn't kiss my babies. Sniff, sniff. I'll update soon with more pics and trip info.

For now, here is a pic of Mr. Pinkie and I from the trip. We were at a vineyard in the Hill Country that was absolutely gorgeous. I wanted to stomp on some grapes like Lucy, but you might know the dumb harvest isn't until August. FOOEY! Oh well, my white skirt might not have survived.

Leaving on a jet plane.....

Actually, we'll be leaving in a car, but I couldn't resist the title. We'll be heading out tomorrow evening for a week away. Rest assured, I will take tons of pics and tell all about it when we return. Unfortunately, without the kids, there probably won't be any stories to tell. My update post-vacation with no children would probably be something like...."Blahh, blah, blah, slept, blah, blah, blah, slept, blah, blah, blah, food, blah, blah, blah, peed, blah, blah, slept, blah, blah, blah, drive, blah, blah, blah..." You get the idea.

Hasta La Vista!

Swim Meet

Jack had a great day at the swim meet! The events were cut short due to the weather, but he placed first in his heat for the freestyle and 9th overall for that event. He placed 3rd or 4th in his heat for the backstroke and 6th overall for that event. His relay team placed 6th in the medley relay. What really stinks is that I feel certain he would have placed in the breast stroke, one of the events that was cancelled. Even more so, I KNOW his relay team for the freestyle relay would have placed...Grrrr. This was probably his best swim experience so far, since he was relatively calm and knew what to expect after the time trials last week. It's amazing to watch him swim because it all seems so effortless. I can only imagine how awesome he will do when he starts really getting into the competitive aspect of the events. For now, he is just interested in beating his previous times and getting a ribbon. HA!

The Story of the Creepy FedEx man.

Well. I guess you may be let down by the level of creepiness found in this story; however, every time the fellow leaves my house (which is every day due to Mr. Pinkie's work,) I am struck by a weird feeling that crawls all over me like flies on a rotten apple. You see, I am pretty sure the man, in his late 40's to early 50's, has the hots for Mr. Pinkie. If I answer the door, he remains very courteous while presenting me with Mr. Pinkie's delivery before heading on his way. This can have nothing to do with the fact that I almost always answer the door in the form of some domestic goddess/angel...what with my bare feet and 3 sizes too large jogging pants that are cut-off rather choppily to Capri length with one leg longer than the other and sagging at dangerously low levels, a stained tank top with ravioli smeared about, or the ALWAYS perfectly coiffed hair-do that I invariably am sporting.

No, you let Mr. Pinkie answer the door and this man lights up like a firefly. He talks and talks and GIGGLES and asks questions and seems so genuinely interested in any facet of Mr. Pinkie's life, verily I tell you, he seems nigh onto swooning every time Mr. Pinkie is present. I have eavesdropped on certain front porch conversations between the two, and I will admit (a lesser woman would be able to do no such thing) that I have been tempted to step outside and drape myself seductively over Mr. Pinkie in a grand show of HE BELONGS TO ME!!, but I haven't done that as of yet. Is it weird to be jealous of the FedEx man's intentions? I am thinking probably that it is.

Mr. Pinkie, being in possession of the kindest, most naive heart of anyone I've ever known, thinks that the FedEx man is "just a really nice guy" as he pats me patiently on the shoulder and pecks me on the cheek. While I glare at the FedEx truck as it pulls out of the drive.

I'm telling you. The man is after my man. Mr. Pinkie is afraid to answer the door now for fear of being ravished by the delivery man. Hehee.

Are marshmellows in season?

I should probably be packing for The Great Escape, aka Mommy and Daddy are leaving town for a while, especially since tomorrow I have tons of errands to run, Saturday is a swim meet that will likely last the entire day, and Sunday is Father's Day and also the evening of our expected departure. Am I packing? Nope. Why? Because it's one of those days where the kids are playing nicely (some stars somewhere must be aligned,) and I am mostly through a really good romance story that just won't let me put it down. Besides, we spent all day yesterday swimming at the GrandPinkie's house, and the kids seem to have gotten a lot of pent up energy out.

I just had to go break up a fight that ensued after Sam called his sister a "banana split." In the Pinkie house, that is the worst slur you can fling at someone. To call them a Banana Split. Seriously. We're not sure when, or how, it started, but it renders everyone under the age of 9 in this house (which is 3 people)completely irrational and full of vengence.

Where was I? Packing. Swimming. Banana splits. Think. Think. Ah, marshmellows. Sam asked me today if marshmellows were 'in season.' Yes? Er, I think they are. Anyone care to expound upon that?

((Yes, I would like your chicken salad and corn dip recipes!! Send them my way girl.))

((Creepy FedEx man story to follow....))

I would like to point out....

I would like to remind you that this Friday evening starts a brand new season of Man vs. Wild epis!!! Please excuse me while I go find a container large enough to fill with my over abundance of JOY!

Random..haha.

Is anything I ever say here NOT random? Hehe. I make me giggle.

Random Thing #1:
Daddy and Mommy Pinkie are going on a trip next week. Alooone. Alooone means ALOONNNEEE. The baby Pinkies will be staying with the GrandPinkies. Do you hear that? It's me, in Texas, shouting for joy! I can't wait.

Random Thing #2:
I am having a serious, serious hankering for pizza. Gooey, cheezy pizza. After realizing that we were dipping into our retirement account (I exaggerate, or do I?) to fund our pizza habit, we have attempted to put the brakes on. I'm thinking we've held out for as long as we're gonna. ((Pause while I look for the Dominoes number...))

Random Thing #3:
Creepy FedEx guy just came and went. Have I ever posted about him? Let me know.

Random Thing #4:
Does anyone out there have any DELICIOUS picnic food ideas? We're traveling with some friends of ours next week, and we'd like to participate in a lovely and memorable picnic extravaganza. Any ideas? Anyone?

Random Thing #5:
I don't think there is a #5.

That will be detention for you, little missy.....

Jack had a dentist appointment this morning at 8:30. AM. As in, CHEW YOUR TOAST FASTER IT'S 8:15 ALREADY, AND IT TAKES ME 45 MINUTES TO GET TO THE DENTIST OFFICE FROM HERE..AND QUICK, GO MAKE YOUR TEETH LOOK LIKE WE FLOSS EVERY 7 MONTHS OR SO. Not that I'm trying to paint a false picture here. The Pinkies are known for sliding into parking lots with our back tires smoking and children spilling out of all sides of the vehicle in a dead run. It's because of our ability to drive like Nascar professionals and hoof it like track stars that we are rarely late. VERY ON TIME, but rarely late. This morning, well, let us just say that we arrived a 9:00 for our 8:30 appointment. I'd love to be able to blame something or someone specific, but I honestly don't know what made us be so late. The end result was the same no matter whose fault it was. Ms. Happy Sunshine, the receptionist, informed us that we would have to reschedule our appointment, at which time Jack pumps the air with his fist and flashes his dimples to the tune of, "YES! I am one LUCKY boy. YEAH!"
On July 24th, we're going to try and arrive on time for our dental appointment. Would someone out there care to remind of that a few days ahead of time?

This just in....

Some of you had asked how Jack placed at time trials this past Saturday. Due to there being so many heats in each event, the results are handed out the week following the meet. He placed 3rd in the backstroke, but I don't think he placed in the freestyle or breast stroke, which is no surprise. He really choked during the breast stroke. He only learned to do it a week or so ago. HA! I'm very proud of him. I'm also very excited about the potential his coaches see in him for this sport. Finally! Something other than baseball (which was a disaster) and football (which he despises.)

Smile!

Time Trials

Jack had his first swim meet today. More specifically, we had to leave our house at 5 AM in order for Jack to have his first swim meet today. These were the time trials, and next Saturday will be the first "race day." Jack was a smidge overwhelmed by the mass of humanity that attended the meet, but he did just great! Sometimes I look at him, and I'm amazed at how grown he is. I am such the old lady. Ug.

Amazing Mom-isms of the day, er...morning.

*We do not drink maple syrup!

*Who ever got out the tinker toys needs to pick them up.

*Do not tape those Hot Wheels cars to the bottoms of your feet. No, they are not going to work like roller skates.

*Please stop making that noise with your brother's armpit.

*Do not throw the dog.

*Do not lick the dog.

*Do not lick the dog even if he licked you first.

*Stop copying your sister.

*Who left the tinker toys out?

*No, we do not eat lunch at 10:30.

*Stop calling your sister a "dirty dog."

*Sophy pick up the tinker toys.

*Stop playing on the phone.

*You do not have to cry just because someone called you an Orange Chicken.

*Get the plastic bag off of your head.

*I don't know what a roly-poly smells like.

*You are 6 years old. You should know how to wipe yourself by now.

*Yes, picking up the tinker toys IS a great idea. Now do it.

*No, it's still not lunch time.

*We do not yell at the mail lady.

*Now. See how nice the rug looks without the tinker toys on it?

*Step away from the cat.

Water World

Between swimming lessons times three, swim team for Jack, swimming parties, and swimming at friend's houses, we are in a constant state of of undry. We have converted our mudroom into the drying room for suits, towels, etc. It's a problem that I am thankful, at the moment, to have. The kids love, love, love to swim, and it really helps keep the kids occupied for hours at a time. If I keep my fingers crossed, maybe Daddy Pinkie will be convinced that the Pinkie family needs a pool addition....and quick! Mr. Pinkie is convinced that the cost of an adding an inground pool is something in the ballpark of a buying a home. In a strange twist of irony, I am the more optimistic pool shopper. I really feel like we can find a good deal that would get us an inground for a decent price. I know they're not cheap, don't get me wrong. We shall see.

Camping Shots

Happy, happy girl!



This rock shelf was so cool. It was so smooth and large enough that the kids could have a shallow splashing area. Sophy was singing, "I believe I can fly..." while Jack pretended to do just that.

We visited a cavern near our camping site. It was a really interesting stop. Sophy, upon realizing how oozy, drippy, dirty, and "icky" the belly of the cavern was, immediately began asking to go shop for jewelry in the cavern gift shop where they had tons of stones and silver jewelry. She bought some dragonfly earrings, a necklace with a dolphin flipper pendant, and an elephant for her elephant collection chiseled out of green agate...or some such rock-mineral-thingy.

Our tour guide girl was so obnoxious. Y'all. Words can not express how spoofable this chic was. She was an episode of Saturday Night Live WAITING to happen. By the end of the hour and a half long tour, I had almost chewed through my tongue in an effort to not guffaw in her presence. She was hilarious, and she didn't even know it. Jack, ever the science nerd, looked at her all googley-eyed and breathless and said, "Wow. You're so smart."


I love this shot of the guys fishing.

Things I learned while camping with my family.

The Pinkies just returned from a camping trip with the Gramps Pinkies, the cousin Pinkies, the Auntie/Uncle Pinkies, etc. We had a super-terrific time, and I hope to share some photos in the days ahead. For now, I'd like to sum up some of the things that were affirmed for me on this trip.
1. I hate camping.
2. There are times when you just need to be $@#$@# to someone.
3. I don't want boob implants.
4. Your period is still your period (only magnified) in the woods.
5. My dad is like a really old child. Bless my poor Mama's heart.
6. Someone with more authority than myself needs to revoke my husband's driver's license. And fishing license.
7. Television matters. I don't care what anyone says. I want it and lots of it.
8. Migraines are for my brain what viruses are for my children. They only show up on vacations or school holidays.
9. No matter how hard I try, I will always be phobic about not being able to see my feet while standing in cloudy water. End of story.
10. I am thankful I have my dad's sweat glands instead of my mother's. She sweats like a 400 pound lumberjack on crack.
11. Texas is truly the hottest planet in the solar system.
12. When a sign says HIGH WATER, do NOT attempt to drive past it.
13. Sometimes something that looks like a snake is actually a very large stick placed by your 6 year old to frighten you. Ahem.
14. I hate camping.
15. My husband has no qualms about stealing a coffee cup from a Hilton hotel. (Yes, we stayed at a Hilton on our way home from camping. So shoot me. Free Paris.)
16. Me and my siblings are slowly morphing into our parents. Which is odd because our children are slowly morphing into versions of our young selves. QUANTUM LEAP! Remember that show?
17. S'mores should be renamed S'Messy.
18. Mud is mud no matter where you are.
19. Nike soles are no match for a campfire.
20. Bear Grylles is an inspiring fellow. I dedicate every adventurous moment from my week to him, including this one that involved a trek through waist deep, CLOUDY river water. OMG.