Gas Meters. No, we're not talking about Sam.

So, we've had a bit of snafu on the self-proclaimed journey back to normal. I don't know if you can make this long story short, but I'll try to outline the basics:

• Smelled gas in Sophy's room, since meter is outside her exterior walls we thought we better investigate.
• Our particular gas company pulls the meter when there is a problem. They do not return it until you fix the problem.
• Turns out our problem was in a remote portion of the yard that has nothing to do with our house.
• The crooks The Gas Co., it turns out, took their little meter and went home. In case you are wondering, our stove and hot water heaters are gas users, unlike Sam who is a gas emitter.
• Enter The Code Nazis The Code Police of our little dink town. These crooks folks are serious about their money code enforcement and will not allow your meter to be reinstalled until you allow the abovementioned @#$#$@ group of men into your home to allow them to invent discover what is not up to their imaginary arbitrary undisclosed code. Once the alleged highly suspicious infractions are noted, you must pay to obtain a permit to have the @$@#$ fixed. Oh, did I fail to mention that this is where you contact the plumber to see if he wants your first born how much the pretend infractions are going to cost to fix? I did fail to mention that? Oh well, yeah, there is a plumber involved too.
• Where was I? Oh yes, long story short....well, we should have gas again on Tuesday. Yes, Tuesday. We should also be minus about $2000. All for a the correction of a valve that is worth about $45.00.
• In the meantime, we're taking strange French baths out of bowls and eating only the finest cuisine our microwave has to offer.
• Just say no. To gas.